i have a little habit. when life starts getting out of hand, i like to make it worse. i'm honestly not sure if it's my own mind, or the enemy planting lies [probably a combination of both], but i will grab onto a tiny little lie and grow it and twist and chew on it until i'm caught up in a full on stronghold. a spiraling episode , i call it. in high school, when i wasn't as aware of what was actually happening, i called it "letting my imagine run wild". i'd come up with scenarios and play out the entire thing to its logical, or illogical, bitter end. a disaster really. a crisis of the mind. a crisis of belief. lately i'd been doing really well when it comes to these episodes, meaning they were becoming fewer and further between. but recently life started feeling heavy. for awhile, i put one foot in front of the other and waded through it. but then i got blindsided. you can call me crazy, but i believe the enemy gives me dreams sometimes. terrible...