Skip to main content

to my firstborn [from the archives]

you have one more day to be my baby...

tomorrow morning we'll wake up, we'll get in the car and we'll drive to the hospital,
and you'll become a big sister.
technically, you won't be my baby anymore. you'll be my big girl...

God has equipped you in so many ways to be a big sister.
you are kind and thoughtful and compassionate,
always looking after others and making sure they're happy and comfortable.
you love to help me around the house, and you love little babies.
your family is so important to you.
i believe you will be Tessa's favorite and best friend, almost by default,
and i hope that each day you choose her to be yours too

i pray that you grow to be the kind of girl, teenager, woman that she can look up to.
you love to do right, and you love positive reinforcement.
i pray i can nurture that desire into a love for goodness and mercy and mostly just Jesus.

Tessa will need you.
you will identify with her so much better than we can.
she'll need you when we aren't being fair.
she'll need you when we aren't around.
she'll need you when we don't understand.
i think you're up for the challenge.
and when she's old enough, you'll need her too.
after all, you'll have the same two crazy "old fashioned" parents.
you will "get" each other like no one else can.
you will be her confidant 
and i hope you'll see that as a big responsibility,
but one you feel privileged to carry.

God chose you to be the big sister in our family.
He chose you to be the guinea pig, the one with whom we'll make our parenting mistakes.
i think you have the kind of heart that will extend grace to us, and i'm thankful for that.

you've already told me how you plan to teach Tessa how to walk, stand, crawl...
and play with your Chuggington town.
i hope you discover a wonderful playmate in your sister.
i hope that you will develop a bond stronger than anything else on this earth.
the two of you will share secrets that only the two of you will ever know.
you will love and play and argue and fight and make up and love.
this sister bond has the potential to be the most important earthly relationship in your life.

tomorrow you will wake up and you'll be the big sister.
wear that title proudly.
if you ask, Jesus will give you everything you need to fulfill that calling.

i love you more than you could ever know.
and do you wanna know a secret?
you'll always be my baby, no matter how many more babies join our family.

** every single one of these photos were taken by my cousin-in-law Melissa 


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. such a sweet post... and i LOVE LOVE all the pictures!!!

  3. This is so sweet! My Husband and I are currently trying for baby #2 and I often think of how our son will be the 'big brother' and how it will be a totally new adventure for him. Really tugs at the heart strings! :)

  4. So beautiful! Congratulations all around!


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

on embracing disappointment

sometimes it's the hardest thing we'll ever do to pause our ever-moving-forward agendas long enough to see another person. to have compassion and grace and understanding for them, especially when it interferes with our desires, when it means laying down our own needs in order to meet theirs.

our own motives and our own agendas can feel so important and forefront, so that moment of yielding to someone else can feel almost impossible. like a death of sorts.

because you know what? it hurts to die to self. it just does, no matter how insignificant it may seem to an onlooker.

but i'm learning to embrace all of the emotions that come with disappointments like this, not to ignore them or feel shame for experiencing them (probably the hardest part for me). to feel them, acknowledge them, let them sit there while i figure out the next right thing.

it's hard work to live in the tension of wanting to be healthy and magical and able to live above the waves - while still being very…

hope spoken 2014 | a little recap

well. it feels weird to be back here in this space. i haven't regularly blogged for over a year. i'm feeling like it's time for a redesign but that's beside the point. i'm really here to tell you about Hope Spoken conference that i attended in dallas 2 weekends ago. everyone has been saying how they need time to process everything. i'm no exception. what i'm about to share is really an email i wrote to casey and danielle a few days after i got home, but i've edited and expanded a little. there is still so much more in my heart and mind that's not quite ready to come out:

i'm finally sitting down to pour out my heart after such an amazing weekend. the first thing that's hitting me is these three girls went with a dream and a mission and a calling from Jesus, and were brave to walk through the door and keep going, as danielle describes it. i'm sure they imagined how beautiful it would be but i don't think they could have imagined just …

because He became a man

recently i had one of those days where my to-do list consisted of six different super-quick errands. seems simple enough to most people. before kids you could knock them all out in less than an hour and go about your day. but with kids, forget about it. you dread the outing for two days and put it off until you have no more food or toothpaste and your husband is wondering about the dry-cleaning and the alterations.

when you have to strap and unstrap three kids into their carseats for six different super-quick errands, it's a whole new kind of monster. it takes longer to get them in and out of the car than the amount of time we actually spend inside the post office, or the dry cleaner, or the bank. multiply that by six and we're all going crazy.

truly, there needs to be a drive-through dry cleaner, drive through full-service post office window, drive through banking (not just ATM but actually denominations-other-than-twenty banking), and a drive-up pre-order Target service woul…