choosing to see it

These past two months have been killer for me. I couldn't figure it out until one day it just smacked me in the face: somehow I lost my joy. Being in the Word, listening to worship music all day long, reading and writing about His goodness. Even all of that didn't snap me out of it. I have this tendency to allow burdens to pile up unnecessarily. My kids are driving me crazy, my husband has been working a lot, I have deadlines and due dates and to-do lists a mile long. I let that stuff swirl in my head non-stop. I think about it, mull over it, rehearse it, problem-solve it , and even make up scenarios in my mind. As if I need one more thing to think about? My brain is constantly full, taking up all the room I usually like to save for rational or creative or happy thoughts. It's just a jumbled mess in there sometimes.

I''m a melancholy girl, and I can get pretty down when I allow myself to. I can feel down about my own life just as easily as I can about the state of the world, the injustices and huge disparities between those who have and those who have not. If I'm not careful, the enemy can create a burden from my compassionate heart just as easily as he can from my fear or stress or lack of trust in the Lord. He's tricky alright.


  1. Just wanted to say that I so resonated with this post. Thank you for sharing your heart, as always... :-)

  2. Awesome blog!