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wishing there was more to show for it

i sat down to play my piano today. it was horrendous. for someone who took piano lessons for almost twelve years, you'd think i'd be a brilliant pianist. not true. you know what they say, "if you don't use it, you lose it"? that's what happened here....

then i started thinking, i've been a Christian for 20+ years. oh, how i wish i had more to show for it. shouldn't i be "further along" than i am?

maybe you hate praying out loud, because you know how grossly obvious it will be that you never pray in private? yeah, i've been there. the beautiful thing is, you can change that... just start praying. not to look good in front of others, but because it will change your life.

do you think God won't hear you? do you think He's long gone and done with you? not true. don't allow the enemy one more minute of control over your life or your thoughts. God loves you more than you could ever fathom, and He longs to prove that to you.

i used to read psalm 51 and psalm 103 daily. i was coming back into fellowship with God after a long hiatus. some of my favorite excerpts are these:

psalm 51:
10 Create in me a pure heart, O God,
   and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11 Do not cast me from your presence
   or take your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation
   and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

psalm 103:
The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
   slow to anger, abounding in love.
9 He will not always accuse,
   nor will he harbor his anger forever;
10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve
   or repay us according to our iniquities.
11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
   so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west,
   so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
13 As a father has compassion on his children,
   so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed,
   he remembers that we are dust.

it doesn't matter how long you've gone astray or how far. just start now. maybe you haven't gone too far astray, but you're just not praying regularly. you're not reading your Bible everyday. just be faithful with today. they say that habits take 21 days to form, right? but you have to start at day one. you can't just wish it. you have to do it. 

to paraphrase my pastor from a recent sermon on prayer:

the worst thing is not that you've stopped praying... the worst thing will be if you fail to start up again.

i love this passage from Isaiah 61:3

They will be called oaks of righteousness,
   a planting of the LORD
   for the display of his splendor.

i want this to be true of me. but it doesn't happen overnight. it happens by starting. taking the first step. and then watching as God uses each little step to change you. each little act of obedience transforms you until you find that you are now that oak of righteousness, planted by the Lord, for His glory.

Psalm 1
1 Blessed is the man
   who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked
or stand in the way of sinners
   or sit in the seat of mockers.
2 But his delight is in the law of the LORD,
   and on his law he meditates day and night.
3 He is like a tree planted by streams of water,
   which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither.
   Whatever he does prospers

[edited to include: if you need some good ideas on how to start or re-start your Bible reading, read this post]


  1. don't those holy experience posts just rock your world? her habit ones lately are so good. glad you linked up today too!! and for what its worth, i think you have A TON "to show for it" being the young woman you are. wow. really, i'm serious. faith and wisdom and teachability! is that a word?

  2. oh, they move me. i have to bookmark her posts in the morning so that i can really sit down and read them during my daughter's nap... a few of the blogs that i follow had linked up yesterday, so i thought i would too!

    and, thank you so much for your encouraging words. really, coming from you, they are worth much. and yes, i think teachability is a word ;)


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